Last weekend, to small fanfare and smaller ratings, CNN debuted a new celebrity interview show,“Stroumboulopoulos.” I will spare you the squinting doubletake: The network did not somehow quietly poach George Stephanopoulos from ABC’s "Good Morning." Instead, they have opted for his near-name-twin, George Stroumboulopoulos, a popular 40-year-old Canadian broadcast star and a kind of Anderson Cooper figure for our neighbors to the north. For his first show, two out of three guests—Martin Short and Howie Mandel—were fellow Canucks who offered up testimonials about the sort of in-depth, high-quality interviews Stroumboulopoulos conducts. Presumably, future shows will have less of a worthwhile Canadian initiative vibe to them. Maybe someday Stephanopoulous will have to worry about being confused with Stroumboulopoulos, rather than vice versa. A spokesman for Stephanopoulous declined to make him available for The New Republic on the topic of being confused with Stroumboulopoulos, citing his busy schedule. CNN also declined. In anticipation of that day, however, we offer below a cheatsheet to the Georges (which doubles as a vision test, for those of you considering reading glasses).
Stephanopoulous: 5’6” or 5’7” (or, according to his wife, “6’7” in bed”)
Stroumboulopoulos: His father is Greek, while his mother is of Egyptian and Ukranian descent.
Stephanopoulous: His Greek immigrant parents worked as a Greek orthodox priest (dad) and as the news director of the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America.
Stroumboulopoulos: Two earrings (same ear), a large skull ring, and, frequently, jazzy socks.
Stroumboulopoulos: Tommy Douglas for “Greatest Canadian”
Stephanopoulous: Bill Clinton’s 1992 presidential campaign
Degree of Polysyllabicness
If you’re still confused, here’s a shortcut: only one of the Georges says “aboot.”