by Sanford Levinson
Moderator:Should we change our Constitution, which we believe is divinely inspired [Editorial Note: This is a reference to Mormon theology, which indeed views the U.S. Constitution as divinely inspired] to allow men like Mel Martinez, the chairman of your party, born in Cuba, great patriot, the senator from Florida, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, to stand here some night?
Romney: Never given that a lot of thought, but with Arnold sitting there, I'll give it some thought, but probably not.
Moderator: Yes or no?
(Unknown): I love the Governator, but...
Moderator: We got two noes.
(Unknown): I think there are other ideas that we should...
Moderator: Governor Gilmore. Two noes. We're moving here.
Gilmore: No, I don't intend to want to amend this Constitution in a variety of different ways, and this would be not a good start to do it that way.
Moderator: So that's a no. Three noes in a row.
Huckabee: After I've served eight years as president, I'd be happy to change the Constitution for Governor Schwarzenegger.
Moderator: Three to one. Congressman?
Hunter: We haven't seen his endorsement yet, Chris.
Moderator: OK. Three to one to no-show?
Hunter: That's a no.
Moderator: OK. Four noes to one. Governor?
Moderator: Five to one. Senator?
McCain: Depends on whether he endorses me or not.
He and I have many similar attributes, so I have to seriously consider it.
Moderator: OK. We've got an overwhelming vote against you, Governor, in your own house.
Paul (?): I'm a no, because I am a strong supporter of the original intent.
[Editorial note: Whatever the Constitution means, it is truly mindless to oppose amending it because of supporting original intent, unless one believes, contrary to all available evidence, that the Framers got everything right.]
Moderator: Oh, God. OK, Mayor Giuliani?
Giuliani: When he called me up to endorse him, he got me on the phone, he said, "Will you endorse me?", and I was too afraid to say no.
Moderator: OK. Congressman Tancredo -- is it no or yes?
Giuliani: I would say yes.
Tancredo: Intimidating as he might be, I'm saying no.
Moderator: OK. We've got two yeses here.