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Two Possible Hillary Speeches

The version Obama supporters want to hear:

--Tonight I am ending my campaign. Ending, not suspending. I congratulate Senator Obama on winning this nomination. And I urge my supporters to put our differences in the past. We may have complaints about the process, but the time has come to unify against John McCain. The stakes in this election are too high for us to carry on grudges. Bill and I are going to do everything in our power to see to it that Barack Obama is the next President of the United States.

--In the heat of this campaign, some tough things were said. When I fight, I fight hard. And I probably underestimated my opponent. But this campaign leaves me with no doubt that Barack Obama is an extremely strong candidate who has proven that, yes, he will be ready on day one.

--Although I will be honored to help Barack in any way that I can, let me say now that I am not interested in being a candidate for vice president. It is because I respect Barack and the campaign he has run so much that I urge him not to be distracted by all the talk of a joint ticket, and to choose someone who will truly allow him to "turn the page" and start fresh.

And the version her core supporters will want to hear: 

--As the Terminator said: I'll be back. None of your "delegates" are locked in until they actually vote for you in Denver in late August. Three months is a long time, pal, especially when the media starts giving you a steel-wool scrubbing.

--If you do get the nomination, I look forward to saying "I told you" so in five months. My first Iowa field office opens in mid-December 2010.

--The last thing I want, Barack, is to be your running mate. That's a first-class ticket on a plane with no wings. Lord knows I don't intend to go down in flames with you. But if you don't offer me the veep slot you can expect 25 percent of the female vote this fall.

--Could all the reporters here tonight please report, one at a time, to the dark alley behind the convention hall? We have a special parting gift for you. 

--Michael Crowley