If you have ever wanted to know the intimate details of Laura Bush's sex life then Curtis Sittenfeld, author of Prep, has a new book for you. Due to drop in time for the Republican convention, American Wife is the tale of "Alice," a fictionalized Laura Bush. According to Radar, Sittenfeld "tells the story of Alice Blackwell, a quiet librarian whose husband Charlie becomes the bumbling president of the United States." But that's not all, Radar has some bone-chilling excerpts of the book, such as "Alice"'s first time with "Charlie": "His butt was small in the way that I always forgot a lot of men's were; how could he possibly be an unscrupulous politician with such a cute little butt?" (For all of our sakes, I won't write the second sentence of that excerpt.)

If that doesn't leave you screaming and headed for the hills, then check out Radar's other excerpts, helpfully categorized under such titles as: "'Alice' discovers that her grandmother is a lesbian"; "'Alice' has doggy-style sex with the brother of the boy she killed"; and "'Alice' gets an abortion." Frankly, after Prep, this book seems a little, shall we say, really tawdry and gimmicky for Sittenfeld. Thoughts?

--Sacha Zimmerman