Self-professed alpha male Erick Erickson needs more men protecting him before he'll go to the movies.

Erick Erickson, the popular conservative radio talk show host and writer, is known among other things for his obsession with according other men beta status.

This is a common obsession of the online right—Erickson is just … let’s call him the alpha beta hunter. So you can imagine my confusion when I checked in this morning to find that Erickson needs more men protecting him before he’ll stop being scared of going to the movies.

I have no confidence in this administration to keep us all safe, particularly in light of President Obama’s statement today that there’s really no way to stop this stuff. There are no metal detectors at American theaters.

Erickson, noted alpha and liberty fighter, wants the Obama government to install metal detectors in privately owned cineplexes or something. For his safety. The ironies really pile up when you juxtapose this panic over hypothetical terrorist gunmen with the right wing consensus, which Erickson joins, that everyone should be packing heat. The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a self-professed alpha male with a gun. Go get ’em, Erick!