America, there’s more to life than breakfast.

Today saw the launch of Time Inc.’s Extra Crispy, a sponsored-content site devoted wholly to breakfast. Now, there is nothing wrong with breakfast. I love breakfast. I’m going to read the hell out of this Extra Crispy article, “How to Coddle the Fuck Out of Your Eggs,” because coddling eggs is difficult. If I were looking for a job, I would apply to be the site’s Bacon Critic, a real publicity gimmick, er, gig. But there can be too much of a good thing, and that is what is happening to breakfast. In the near future, McDonald’s will probably offer nothing but breakfast. Every time I turn on the Food Network, someone is eating and/or making breakfast. And that’s not to speak of brunch, which is just a sneaky way for breakfast to encroach on lunch. Extra Crispy even has an article on “brinner,” an ominous sign of where this is all heading.

But you know what kind of people want breakfast at every meal? Children. Small children. Before we turn into a nation of people who eat cereal at their desks and whip up pancakes for dinner, let’s remember that there is a time to put away childish things. And that time is 11 a.m.