Giphy/Election 2016

Tiffany Trump is very good at writing a very bad college essay.

The 22-year-old Trump, as she reminded the audience early on, just graduated from the University of Pennsylvania (though not, it should be said, from the prestigious Wharton School of Business, where only “really smart” people like her dad are admitted). Among the garbled word salad of convention speeches, Trump reminded listeners of that very special time in life, when you’re listening to Ben Folds on the quad, or scribbling poems in a tea-stained journal wondering how to be the “best version of yourself.” At least she learned better than to crib from others wholesale.

In order:

“...never back down from challenges...”

“It’s often said that with enough effort and determination, you can do whatever you put your mind to.”

“Whatever he does, he gives his all.”

“His desire for excellence is contagious.”

“He’s always helped me be the best version of myself.”

“He’s always encouraged me to always stay true to who I am and what I believe.”

“Donald Trump has never done anything halfway.”

“I believe the measure of a person is revealed in their darkest times.”

Do what you feel in your heart to be right—you’ll be criticized anyway”

“It is the small, loving acts that help an enormous amount in times of grief.”

“If you do what you love, hold nothing back, and never let fear of failure get in the way, then you’ve pretty much figured out the Trump formula.”

(Ok so she didn’t actually say one of these, but we bet you can’t guess which.)