The Washington Post/Getty; (embellished by The New Republic)
George Santos just keeps on giving. Now, he tells Piers Morgan that he told all those lies in 2022 because, well, he told them in 2020, and no one caught him then!
It seemed to us that Santos sometimes just puts any old word in any old place without any regard for reality. So it’s in that spirit that we offer three short George Santos “Blad Blibs”—about his early years, his major accomplishments, and his plans for America. Come help George tell his inspiring story.
Hi! My name is George Santos. I was born to a PERSONALITY TRAIT father and a/an ADJECTIVE mother. My parents were just the most ADJECTIVE people, instilling in me the values of PARTICIPATION SPORT and HOUSEHOLD CHORE.
In all modesty, I guess I do have to say I stood out from an early age. I remember Mrs. Talerico, my third-grade teacher, saying, “If every student were like George, my life would be a whole lot COMPARATIVE ADJECTIVE, I.E. END IN -ER.” At college, I ended up studying ACADEMIC MAJOR, where DOG BREED, PLURAL awarded me a full scholarship and a guaranteed apprenticeship to work with them in their ROOM IN HOUSE after graduation.
Well, to make a long story short, I’ve basically PAST-TENSE VERB at everything I’ve done. From PROFESSION to HOBBY, I’ve kicked ass! But I’m easily proudest of that time I invented the KITCHEN GADGET to help alleviate the PRESENT PARTICIPLE, I.E. VERB ENDING IN -ING of the world’s MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURES, PLURAL, about which I care ADVERB. I try not to brag about it. I did it because it was the ADJECTIVE thing to do.
