Don’t Worry, Everyone! Trump Says He Can Walk Up Ramps and Stairs

The bar for America’s highest elected office keeps sinking.

The nation’s totally healthy, very fit, 80-year-old president gave himself a little pat on the back Thursday after he managed to climb on the rally stage at the Peterbilt Motors manufacturing facility in Denton, Texas.

The celebration came amid a dig at the health of his predecessor, former President Joe Biden.

“Don’t forget, when Biden left the stage he spoke very shortly, like two minutes, one minute, as quickly as possible,” Trump said. “Could never find the stairs.”

“I don’t have that problem. You know, these things—you know how many stairs they have?” Trump continued. “Look, I can go ramp, and I can go stair, I can go another stair, another stair in the back, I have a stair here—he could never find a stair.”

Trump is the second-oldest man to ever serve as America’s commander in chief. The octogenarian has spent hours at Walter Reed Medical Center on multiple occasions since he returned to office, has fallen asleep during more than a dozen critical meetings, appeared lost and disoriented around foreign heads of state, frequently slurs his speech, and seems to almost chronically suffer from discolored and bruised skin.

His behavior has also grown increasingly erratic, as he has thrown cheap and petty insults at members of the press, challenged long-standing U.S. alliances, and even taken jabs at the pope.

But Trump has nonetheless insisted that he is perfectly fit to keep the country’s most important job. Since 2024, the self-styled “stable genius” has “aced” several cognitive exams, though his recollections of the tests’ contents have called into question whether he actually took them at all.

The American public is apparently wising up to Trump’s age: A national Strength in Numbers/Verasight poll conducted in July found that public perceptions of Trump’s mental health were on par with Biden’s, with 46 percent of respondents rating Trump’s mental sharpness as “poor.”

Vice President JD Vance thinks that Americans are too worried about the “little things” ahead of midterms—like gas prices, debt, Immigration and Customs Enforcement killings, and war. 

“This is not the time to sort of gripe about all the little things.… I think every single person who voted for us in 2024 could find something where they wish maybe congressional Republicans had gone further,” Vance told Fox News on Thursday. “The challenge here is between Democrats who want to destroy the country, who want to permanently disempower you … and Republicans who fundamentally are trying to solve the problems that Democrats under Joe Biden created.” 

Vance was promptly lambasted online for the out-of-touch comment, something that’s become a bit of a trend for Republicans as they struggle to sell their platform to dissatisfied Americans as midterms approach. 

“So worrying about grocery prices, gas increases and no jobs is ‘griping’??” one liberal account posited. 

“By every metric Trump, Vance and the GOP took what the Biden administration left them and made it worse for the American people,” said another. “If you want to give them two more years, your momma done dropped you on your head. Twice.”

It’s clear that Republicans are grasping at straws, panicking ahead of what is widely predicted to be a brutal midterm rebuke. Just two weeks ago, Vance was begging Americans for “another chance.”  

Donald Trump is attempting to retcon his rationale for attacking Iran.

Speaking at a rally in Durant, Oklahoma, Thursday evening, the president suddenly claimed that part of his impetus for launching an all-out assault on the country seven months ago was because Iran was “doing drugs” at “drug factories.”

The add-on was introduced as Trump boasted about the special mission that preceded the war, Operation Midnight Hammer, in which Trump directed the U.S. military to destroy nuclear facilities in Fordo, Natanz, and Isfahan in June 2025.

​“They went from Missouri and then at one o’clock in the morning, with no moon, dark as can be, these unbelievable machines led by the most incredible pilots in the world, they unloaded every single bomb, went right down air chutes into this, uh, drug factories, really,” Trump told the crowd.

“That’s what they were doing. They were nuclear and drugs. They were doing drugs, but they were doing the nuclear. But these drug factories/nuclear factories were hit so hard.”

It was the first time that Trump ever suggested the war in Iran was about drugs. Up until the Oklahoma rally, Trump had almost singularly blamed the conflict on Iran’s quest to develop nuclear technologies.

Before Operation Midnight Hammer took place, Tehran had argued that it was seeking uranium for peaceful purposes, such as expanding its nuclear energy program. The nation underwent years of nuclear site inspections by the International Atomic Energy Agency, and just weeks prior to the June attack was allowing IAEA inspectors to remain in the country for continuous supervision, according to the United Nations entity.

A series of historic, nationwide protests began in Iran in December 2025, sparked by the collapse of the local currency. Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei’s ensuing crackdown killed thousands of people.

When Trump first announced the U.S.-Iran war in February, he explicitly called on the Iranian people to rise up against their government and obtain their independence.

“When we are finished, take over your government,” Trump said at the time. “It will be yours to take.”

But even after Khamenei was assassinated, Trump’s charge to the Iranian people did not pan out. Instead, Americans have found themselves in yet another unpopular forever war in the Middle East. The ensuing closure of the Strait of Hormuz has also roiled wallets at home, as the American economy contends with rising oil and gas prices.

President Donald Trump went all the way to Texas to trash Ken Paxton in front of his own constituents.

The president offered these comments during his rally at the Peterbilt Motors factory in Denton on Thursday night.

“He can be a pain in the ass sometimes, I’ll be honest. Is he here, by the way? Oh, there he is,” Trump said of the embattled attorney general and Senate candidate. “I didn’t even know if he was here! I don’t care.”

During a rally in Durant, Oklahoma, later that night, Trump even went on to play the recently leaked audio of Paxton talking down on the president’s poorly received midterm GOP convention.

“It was leaked audio that came out yesterday from The New York Times saying Ken Paxton isn’t sure that the numbers after that midterm convention helped him and maybe hurt him. Are they still on board?” a reporter can be heard asking in the clip Trump played. A Trump supporter replied that Paxton was wrong.

Trump still encouraged people to vote for Paxton, “whether you love him or you don’t love him.”

The president pretending not to know that a Republican senatorial candidate is at his own rally is deeply unserious—especially when that candidate is locked in a contested race that has the chance to break the historic vice grip that the party has had in the state. Even if Paxton really is a pain in the ass, Trump openly admitting that isn’t necessarily a vote of confidence. And that’s something Paxton sorely needs, as his candidacy has been shrouded in controversy and a lack of enthusiasm.

Collective action spared two men in Oswego, New York Wednesday following a multi-hour standoff with federal immigration agents.

For seven hours, two men were trapped on the roof of a house in the central New York city as Border Patrol agents attempted to arrest them. But the agency’s efforts were upended when more than 50 people gathered in front of the house and, seemingly, rescued the men from the agents’ clutches.

The Oswego Police Department said their officers responded to the commotion after receiving complaints about a reckless driver in the area. Their investigation led them to the private residence on East Seventh Street, where Border Patrol’s Targeted Enforcement Division was attempting to apprehend multiple individuals on federal judicial warrants, according to a police statement.

The specific charges of the warrants have not yet been shared, CNYCentral reported Wednesday.

Around 5 p.m., the Oswego Fire Department arrived to provide a ladder for the pair of men to climb down. However, it quickly became clear that the men did not want to utilize the ladder, as they kicked and pushed it away from the rooftop’s edge. The fire department then decided to exit the scene, leaving the ladder behind them.

“I want to be clear that our efforts last evening were for safety first and not an effort to apprehend individuals,” said Oswego Fire Chief Paul Conzone. “Once we provided the ladder to safely assist the individuals on the roof, we cleared the scene and only returned to retrieve our ladder once the incident concluded.”

Border Patrol decided to cut their losses hours later, after which the remaining crowd decided to confront a group of broadcast journalists, throwing articles of clothing over the journalists’ camera lenses while demanding that they stop recording.

When the standoff was over, the two men had disappeared from the rooftop and escaped in waiting cars, according to CNYCentral.

“I recognize that incidents involving federal agencies can generate strong emotions,” said Oswego Mayor Robert A. Corradino in a statement Thursday. “Even so, our responsibility as a city is clear: we protect our residents, safeguard our neighborhoods, and maintain order.”

“Oswego’s strength has always been its people, and yesterday our community showed that even in challenging moments, safety and civility remain our priority,” Corradino added.